So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Randomize
