The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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