Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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