I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
