Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
