The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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