508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
