Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
We are two peas in an std pod
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Randomize
