I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
