Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize