Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Operation Purity has been aborted
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Randomize
