I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Randomize