i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
