i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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