Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
