I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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