oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I yelled at your uterus for you.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
