There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Randomize
