I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
