he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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