I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
