It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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