Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Randomize
