I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
