so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
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