Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize