were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
