My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
