Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize