i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
i love accidental penises.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
