The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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