i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Randomize
