i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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