She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize