the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
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