Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
