I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
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He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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