sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Randomize
