I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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