And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
