we have pet lesbian snakes
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
