Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
