he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
