i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
50% drunk capacity currently
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize