really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Randomize
