What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize
