I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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