So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
my poor anus
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
