Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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