Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Randomize
